Firstly i’d like to explain any sudden and unexpected glasswear breakages you may have experienced today and let you know that I had a singing lesson this afternoon. It went really well, I think that with a few more sessions I could be almost as good as John and Edward.
Wurly the chinchilla went for the snip this week and unfortunately for him it was the vet kind, not the beauty parlour kind. Yes, as if the poor little guy didn’t have enough to deal with by being born so irresistibly cute and cuddly, now us nasty humans have gone and taken away what was his only manly pride and glory. But wait, it gets even worse - not only was the buggar so brutally emasculated, he then returned home in a drug induced daze only to be chased away by Curly. Yes that’s right, the very same day as he was cruelly robbed of his manhood, he was then beaten up by a girl!
It’s suddenly occurred to me that although I’ve told you plenty about my own pets, I’ve so rudely never even mentioned my boyfriend’s own pet. It’s difficult to describe Liam’s pet as I have yet to see her particular species listed in any book or web page, so I’ve composed a poem that I think best sums her up;
In amongst the rubble, beneath his bed,
Lives my boyfriend’s favourite pet.
She thrives under there where it’s dusty and hairy,
Because she’s his magical cleaning fairy!
She hovers behind him where ever he goes
Sweeping up toenails and picking up clothes.
She lets him relax and does all of the jobs,
So he can live the life of a complete and utter slob.
He can finish a drink, hot or cold,
Then leave the cup out until it starts to sprout mould.
Once upon a time, before he brought his new pet home,
The mould got so thick that he could have sworn he heard it groan!
Tearing through the house, a path of destruction in his wake,
He never gives his poor little fairy a break.
He’s got no time for cleaning, housework is such a bore,
but that’s OK cos in the blink of an eye, the house is magically spotless once more.
She eats up crisp packets for breakfast, dirty socks for tea,
She snacks on dust until his house is pristine.
He loves their little arrangement, but if only he really knew,
that it’s all the secret handy work, of his sucker of a girlfriend, Sue!
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Where can I get one?
ReplyDeleteYou're sooooooo like your sister ;)
ReplyDeleteHi Susanne. Really enjoyed your little poem - "Liam's special pet" and it was most entertaining to read your other blogs too. You certainly love your animals.
ReplyDeleteI've got details on the dog massage lady, Natalie Lenton.Her phone number is 01562 630535, but it's probably best to start by checking out her web site at www.k9massage.co.uk
You might also like to look at www.theicat.co.uk/courses.htm and also www.caninetherapy.co.uk/courses
Both sites advertise canine massage courses. Good luck there.
I've photocopied some information about tracing the parents of adopted persons for you to pass on to your parents. I'll get them in the post tomorrow. The information might suggest a starting point for your parents research, but if they'd like to talk about how they might start further searches in the records, I'd be happy to speak to them.
By the way, Big Cyril - Rochdale's former member of parliament, was Cyril Smith. You might like to check him out on wikipedia! He has a larger than life personality and it sounds as if he's still alive!!!
Hope the curry was well received.
Best wishes - Nick Lloyd
nicklloyd17@o2.co.uk